The OFFICIAL Edinbour Chronicles!

Edinbour

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN! I brought up in a previous Thread (https://www.voidcentury.club/d/2140-edinbour-chronicles-yay-or-nay) about sharing stories/memories from my life. 100% Yay, 0% Nay. Yay! There's still voting until the end of the Month, but if you don't want to read, learn and laugh (maybe cry at times) then don't read it! These memoirs will not be in chronological order since I'll randomly remember something and want to share it. Also, these are 100% factual and legit. I don't see the need to 'spice up' my stories, nor 'sugar coat' the more depressing ones. Thankfully, there aren't too many of those.

The format? I'm going to post everything here as to not make dozens of Threads and have the Admins wag their finger at me saying "no no, please don't do that.." 😛 so it'll be easier to manage and moderate. At the top of each story post, I'll put in big bold lettering something like - CHAPTER 1: (TITLE, EMOTION) then a brief anecdote or description of what's to come. Emotion being (FUNNY - you'll probably laugh) or (DRAMTIC/DEPRESSING - You might cry) or something else, I don't know.. 🙂

TL;DR I hope that these stories give you a good laugh and maybe teach you a thing or two about life itself. I'm not getting any younger and want to share my life experiences with you all. Because I love you. I hope you love me too! <3

Judgement

Subscribing to this thread for sure. Storytime with Edin!

Edinbour

Chapter 1: "Booger-Boy" (FUNNY)

I posted this before the upgrade to v. 2.0 so many of you have already read this. Regardless, here's the story again for anyone who haven't read it!

This is a story I am not particularly proud of, but the statute of limitations on it has run out, so you cannot legally call me by any other nickname. Here goes:

24 years ago, when little baby boy Edinbour was at the tender age of 8, his mommy decided to transfer him from public school to private. Now, tiny tyke Edinbour wasn't very social, quite shy in fact, so when it came time for first day assembly, he decided to pick his nose and eat his boogers. Only one other kid caught nasty ass Edinbour in the act and shouted "THAT KID JUST PICKED HIS NOSE AND ATE HIS BOOGERS!" Yet somehow, nobody turned to see what had just transpired.

The class that Booger-meister Edinbour was in, had another young lad in it, who could pass as Edinbooger's brother. Not a twin mind you, but the similarities were uncanny. Children's' brains are the size of walnuts and thus have trouble remembering much of anything (facial recognition for example) so cut to a few days later and the wannabe Edin-brother was charged with the crime of picking his nose and eating his boogers, so for a few years after the event, he was labeled as "booger-boy" while the true culprit (me) got away with it.

I never called him booger-boy since I felt a little bad, but I also did not rectify the situation, because that wasn't a nickname I wanted throughout my school years.

And that's how I got away with committing such a heinous crime.

STAY TUNED FOR CHAPTER 2! 🙂

negatibuhige

Edinbour And that's how I got away with committing such a heinous crime.

Dyamm. Can't believe your luck xD

sweetjacky

Oh yeah I remember that one xD

You sure got lucky that you got away there and saved yourself from getting a nickname like that.
But I also hope the other guy is doing alright. Something like that can have a huge impact on a kid. Must have been pretty shitty for him to get a nickname for something he didn't even do (unless he did the same thing and you just didn't know about it).

Ps: This is actually the first thread I'm following on the new software 😳

Edinbour

sweetjacky

cleand

This was 20+ years ago and last I checked, he's doing well. 😛 As mentioned, that nickname only stayed with him for a few years, until we all got older (I went to a private school) which reminds me about 3 more stories! 😃

cleand

Subscribing to this thread. Lol. I like reading anecdotes. While reading your first entry, I was wondering how the other boy felt? Must have been hard.

Edinbour

Chapter 2: "Shattered Leg and Shattered Dreams" (INFORMATIVE)

The year is 2016. What a craptastic year it was, since I was hospitalized on 4 occasions. This particular story happened in November. My best friend Donnie Jay jokingly always called me a "jumbo-klutz" which is true. lol

I was on several medications (Anti-Anxiety, Anti-Depressants, etc._ and I was a raging Alcoholic. So stupid me decided to take my meds and chase them with a Vodka Cocktail. Haha oops!

I took a quick nap before having to ride my bike to work, but I didn't make it. I don't even remember it much, but I got on my bike and crashed into a tree just a few houses down and shattered my leg. My brother-in-law was at the bar across the street watching a Football game and heard me screaming, so he called my sister and I was taken to the Hospital.

Upon arrival, the Orthopedic Surgeon and his Assistant had to "reset" my leg (because it was completely shattered and twisted) and boy oh boy, that was not pleasant.. All I remember is staring at the clock and the Assistant telling me "You're doing great!, just a few more minutes"

I'm usually a very patient person, but in this moment, I was an asshole. 5 minutes felt like an eternity so I yelled at him ""JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND FINISH RESETTING MY LEG!" Of course I felt bad when all's said and done.

I was brought up to my Hospital room, and was completely delirious. So much so that I woke up in the middle of the night and called my mommy, asking her what the hell was going on. I was watching a TV Program (Law and Order) so she heard it in the background and thought I was wondering around the streets!

Once I sobered up and realized what was going on, I just went back to sleep. I did require surgery which was scheduled for the next day (or maybe 2 days later) but my sister brought me my laptop. The nurses? Awesome. Very kind and whatnot. The food? Outstanding! Hospital food usually is garbage but the staff brought me a menu and it was like something from a 5* restaurant! I did have a roommate and we chatted every now and then, but he was sleeping 20+ hours a day. Heroin Addiction.

So I got my surgery and had to spend a week in the Hospital to recover. When I saw the X-Ray of my leg, I was dumbstruck. Shattered in 4 places going up to my knee. The Surgeon that fixed me up is one of the best in the State (clearly, since I shouldn't be able to walk now)

I may not be able to run anymore, but the fact that I'm not crippled makes me happy. So, LIFE LESSON: Don't drink if you're on medications, unless you're a masochist and enjoy being in constant pain. Take it from me, pain sucks and although I'm not crippled, I still suffer from having a Titanium Leg, especially when it's cold or raining..

cleand

Edinbour I’m wincing while reading your story. Can’t imagine the pain. Makes me glad that you’re alright now. 🙂

Edinbour

cleand Aye. I got really lucky that I can still walk! My leg still hurts from time-to-time, but it's just something that I have to deal with 😉

sweetjacky

Omg I can't even imagine how painful that must have been for you 😨 You were extremely lucky that you got help so quick and that you had such an amazing surgeon!

I feel like the doctors in the closest hostpital to me would have probably messed up my legs even more ._.

Edinbour

sweetjacky Same here! The closest hospital here, they would've just cut my leg off.. That's why I went to the better, much more expensive one an hour away. Our healthcare sucks balls, but I have great insurance that covered everything. I didn't have to pay a dime for what was easily $100,000. 😛

Edinbour

Chapter 3: "Stupid Sexy Owl" (FUNNY)

I know I posted earlier about sharing a story about my post-work bus ride home, but I'm in a good mood now and even thinking about it makes my blood boil, so y'all have to settle for a funny OPF story instead. For now at least! I have plenty of stories to tell so don't worry.

First off, don't get the title of this quick story confused. I'm sure most of you know Owl, the original creator of the One Piece Forum back in 2012. The title is merely a Simpsons reference so I'm not calling him stupid:

Anywho.. After I became a member of the OPF, Owl and I were chit-chatting and eventually became friends on da Facebook. At this point, I picture most Admins/Moderators of Forums as fat, tubs of goo who were unemployed basement dwellers.. Boy, was I wrong!

Not only was Owl quite an intellectual, but pretty gosh darn good looking to boot! I even showed my sister his pic and she said "he's really good looking!" 😛

So there, just a quick story about how you should never assume anything about anyone before you get to know them and see how they're not chunker basement dwellers 😛

Does this story make me look Gay? Absolutely. Am I Gay? Not really. I find both Men and Women attractive, but I reproduce Asexually through Mitosis, like a Plant. @Marco Polo Are you still in contact with him? I'd like to know how he's doing since he brought us all together.

I'd also like to know his reaction to this story. Hopefully he's flattered 🤣

Not sure what I'll share next time. I have a very long story, but it's also a very sad and painful one. We'll see. Stay tuned and I hope everyone enjoys these and I hope you can appreciate and learn something from them. <3

sweetjacky

Edinbour I picture most Admins/Moderators of Forums as fat, tubs of goo who were unemployed basement dwellers

How did you figure out my real identity? 😨

Marco Polo

Edinbour @Marco Polo Are you still in contact with him? I'd like to know how he's doing since he brought us all together.

Sadly he disappeared right around the time that OPF did… I’m sure he’s fine, though

Edinbour

sweetjacky Oi oi, that's easy to explain but hard to pull off. If I focus hard enough, I can teleport my mind through telekinesis anywhere around the world, like what some characters can do in the film Doctor Sleep 😛

I did once teleport my physical matter years ago, but it was a very short distance and took a lot of energy to do so. Don't believe me? Go on Facebook, search my friends list for one Donald Hess Jr. and ask him about it, since he witnessed it first hand! 😃

cobain

Hi brother, I'm the old Cobain from OPF and I just found out yesterday via sweetjacky that you were in this forum so I thought I could just pass by to check on yourself and I'm glad to see you're doing well. Keep it up man.

Edinbour

Marco Polo I hope so. I'm also sure he is, probably just going through a lot, like most of us all have been. 🙁

Anyways, for those looking forward to my next story, I apologize that I haven't posted one, what with the new job and all, but I might throw y'all a triple-whammy and share a 3 part story all relative to my new job! Same format, just either a long post or 3 separate parts. Basically, day 1, 2 and 3. Part 1 is the one I was going to share a few days ago, but as mentioned, it was an anger inducing one and I wasn't up for posting it (to upsetting myself over something so trivial, but part 3 brings some of that back!

Am I hyping it up a lot? Yes! Will it be the greatest thing ever posted? Nope, but it's still a good read. So, as per usual, stay tuned! Today is my first day off since getting my lazy bones back to work and my everything hurts.. lol

Edinbour

cobain Thank you! And I'm glad that you've returned! 😃

I really hope you're doing well also. I love you all and wish good will towards each and every one of you, my nakama <3

Getting on topic of the thread, I'll post the 3-parter some time tonight. It's my day off, but I've been napping throughout the day due to exhaustion. Plus I'm trying to catch up on chores and other things.

Love you all! Stay tuned 🙂

cleand

I love your Story #3. I was also there in OPF with Owl and all the old gang! I miss him. Thank you for reminding me how great 2012 was. 🙂